The Reign of Lee

Bachelorette 2017 – Episode 4 5 6 Recap

Group Date (AKA – Water We Doing?)

  • Alex
  • Anthony
  • Peter
  • Bryan
  • Jonathan
  • Adam
  • Matt
  • Kenny
  • Lee
  • Iggy
  • Eric
  • Will
  • Josiah

“I want to see who’s ready for commitment. – Rachel.”

Which means Jack Stone cold-killer gets the one-on-one.

The first part of the date takes place on a yacht. They get drunk. Josiah does pushups with Rachel on his back. They do the limbo. Peter raps: “I can tell you something real from my heart or I can tell you something fake like a fart.”

I probably should have said this on the blimp date but…

oh_the_humanity

Peter should just not ever do that again.

The Spelling Bee

This has C-A-T-A-S-T-R-O-P-H-E written all over it.

Rachel thinks guys with intelligence are really sexy. So basically all of these guys should just go home now.

The guys who don’t spell their word right go to detention.

Round One

Adam – “SQUIRT”

Alex – “PASSION”

Jonathan – “CARESS”

Anthony – “SCHMUCK”

Will – “EUPHORIC”

Kenny – “CHAMPAGNE” – C-H-A-M-P-A-N-G-E. He gets detention.

I’m actually impressed these dummies made it this far.

Round Two

Iggy’s word is “BOUDOIR”. He’s off by a mile and is sent to detention.

Adam is out but we’re not shown why.

Eric – “FAÇADE”:  P-H-Y-S-D-E. Breathtakingly off the mark. Did Eric think they said “PhysEd”?

Peter – “COITUS”: Q-U-I-C-U-I. Mad points for originality. If the definition of “coitus” were “quiche and a quicky”, I’m almost certain this is how you would spell it.

Josiah – “STUNNING”
Anthony – “BOUTONNIERE”. WTF? Josiah gets “stunning” and Anthony gets “boutonniere”? This is the only word in the competition I couldn’t spell so I don’t blame Anthony for getting it wrong.

Final Round

Only Will and Josiah are left.

Will – “PHYSIOLOGICAL” – He spells it wrong.

Josiah – “POLYAMOROUS” – He gets it right and is declared the winner.

Since Josiah hasn’t figured out how to make out with himself yet, he makes out with his reflection in his spelling bee trophy.

Night Portion

There’s more? Please, God, make it stop.

The night is mostly centered on two conflicts: 1) Iggy and Josiah get into it over Iggy throwing everyone under the bus and then believing by admitting it, he absolves himself of responsibility. Iggy’s pot-stirring days are numbered so I don’t care. 2) Lee both baits and race-baits Kenny into a fight that will make him look bad in front of Rachel.

Kenny calls Lee an “alternative facts piece of garbage”. 😆

Peter says Lee comes across as very “disingenuwin”. 😆

Kenny and Lee step outside to “have a chat”…

Next Up: Episode 5, Episode 6

6 thoughts on “Bachelorette 2017 – Episode 4 5 6 Recap

  1. BEST RECAP EVER!!!! I laughed so hard reading this that I had to read it a second time and I am still laughing. Emily, your sense of humor is priceless!! This was so worth the wait. I’m grateful you took the time to write it. Thanks for providing me with my laughter therapy!

    • Hi, Marla.

      Thanks so much for your feedback and support. I’m glad I could provide you with laughter therapy!

      🙂

  2. I agree with Maria! This recap was one of your very BEST!!! Thanks for continuing to write. I don’t mind waiting to be entertained! Actually recapping a couple episodes at once makes a lot of sense, especially this season when there have been more than a couple episodes with not much happening! You had some great lines in there Emily. Your take on Lee had me laughing. His hair was way too much. I’m not certain that Bryan is as sincere & invested as Rachel but I’m hoping I’m wrong. She really didn’t have the most interesting group of guys but I’m still curious to see how it all plays out.

    • Hey, Julie.

      Sorry for the delayed response. I hope you subscribe to the comments or you’ll never see this.

      I guess we know now how the season turned out. I still don’t trust Bryan but I’m hoping I’m wrong since I want Rachel to be happy.

      I’m glad you enjoyed the recap. Thank you so much for your continued feedback and support! I really appreciate it.

      🙂

  3. I am pretty sure you covered it all and for the first time in weeks I enjoyed this very boring season, love Rachel, but I agree that she has lousy taste in men. Just like Marla and Julie I love your humor. You brought on the laughter. So worth the wait. Thank you!

    • Hey, Vicki.

      I’m glad the recap was worth the wait. Sorry for the delayed response. I’ve been running out of time every day for the last couple of months.

      I’m glad I could make the season a little better for you. For me, the most fascinating part was the last episode. If only the whole season had been that compelling.

      Thank you for your feedback and support!

      🙂

Leave a Comment

captcha

Please enter the CAPTCHA text