After Kaitlyn is done saying goodbye to Ben, she walks back into the rose ceremony and toasts Shawn and Nick. Then she leaves the room and Nick and Shawn are left in the room alone together. They pace awkwardly around the room sipping their champagne. Neither of them says a word to each other. It’s so weird and so tense I’m thinking it’s going to turn into an actual physical brawl. But after about 20 seconds of this awkwardness, the show cuts to commercial.
WTF was that all about? I was literally gesturing at my TV screen and asking, “AND????”
But nothing. When the show comes back from commercial, it’s time to meet Nick’s family.
Ashley mistaking a pomegranate for an onion on Chris Soules’ season was pretty f*cking weird but this tops that. I’m officially dubbing this the weirdest moment in the history of the Bachelor franchise.
Kaitlyn Meets Nick’s Family
Instead of going to the families’ hometowns this season, all the families are converging on Deer Valley, Utah. It’s completely against format but I guess they’re making budget cuts? They’ve definitely cut the travel locations the last two seasons. Chris’s season was abysmal for any contestants who went on the show hoping to see the world. They saw a whole lot of Iowa and not much else.
Kaitlyn meets Nick’s family first but before they do, Nick and Kaitlyn sit down for a chat:
Nick: “Remember how you asked me about this time compared to last time? I don’t like to compare but last time, even though I was really sure about my feelings, I definitely had some questions… I was pretty much ready [to propose] but if I was going to get that opportunity, I was definitely going to have to take a leap of faith… and with you, I don’t have to take a leap of faith… I am totally in love with you. More than I can even say in words.”
Nick sure does know what to say to get girls to make out with him.
We get a glimpse of Nick’s family before Kaitlyn and Nick come into greet them. They all seem like they’re about to attend Nick’s funeral rather than meet his future wife. Shocking that they would still feel burned after last year’s debacle.
Kaitlyn is vomit-worthy nervous to meet Nick’s family which, to me, is a good sign. It means she feels like a lot is riding on how things go with Nick’s family because she sees him as a potential husband. The family is shocked and simultaneously relieved and terrified that Nick is one of the final two. Relieved because he’s made it so far. Terrified because he was in this exact same position last year before his heart got slammed against the rocks.
Nick has a ridiculous number of siblings that all sit down with Kaitlyn. Bella, the youngest, asks Kaitlyn what Vancouver is like and if she loves Nick. It’s cute but also kind of sad because all Kaitlyn can say is that she cares about Nick a lot which is the same answer Andi gave her last year.
The toughest part is when Kaitlyn sits down with Mary, Nick’s mother. I’ve never met the woman but she seems like one of the sweetest people on the planet. She has tears in her eyes for most of the visit because she doesn’t want to see Nick go through what he did last year.
Mary: “I know that for him to go back on the show he had to have seen something really special in you… And I just can’t imagine [you] bringing him all this way just to break his heart which isn’t really fair for me to say. I’m just being this protective mom.” I just want to give Mary a hug, she’s so sweet.
Nick and his mom sit down for an emotional chat. Nick talks about his connection with Kaitlyn and about how naive he was last year to think that his feelings were indicative of Andi’s. He reassures his mom that no matter what happens, he has no regrets.
After Nick and Kaitlyn say goodbye to his family, they go up to Kaitlyn’s hotel room for some one-on-one time.
Nick whispers in her ear: “I love you.”
Kaitlyn whispers back: “Promise?”
Nick: “With all my heart.”
Seriously, the boy should quit selling software and write romance novels. I only mention this conversation because it so clearly demonstrates a deeper and more natural connection than what Kaitlyn has with Shawn. The show could be fooling me but I’m now willing to make my prediction that Nick and Kaitlyn end up together. If they don’t, God help Kaitlyn trying to make a marriage work with Shawn’s dumb ass.
Kaitlyn Meets Shawn’s Family
Shawn is waiting to tell Kaitlyn he loves her because: “Kaitlyn has to get along with my family. If she didn’t, then it wouldn’t work.”
Really? You rave about how much you love her but you’d let your family’s opinion determine whether you end up with her? In the immortal words of the Bee Gees, “How deep is your love?”
Shawn’s family looks nothing like him. He talks like his father but he bares zero resemblance to his sisters. Was he adopted? Or did his mom have an affair with the pool boy the year Shawn was conceived?
Shawn’s family is as surprised as Nick’s was to find out Shawn is one of the final two guys. Shawn and Kaitlyn rave about their instant connection.
Kaitlyn talks to his sisters who both give her their blessing.
Shawn’s father is extremely skeptical and concerned it might just be lust between them. Really? They’ve spent all of maybe 20 hours alone getting to know each other, most of which were spent goofing off or f*cking. I think it’s definitely lust or at most infatuation. I don’t care what instant magical connection they felt that first night.
But despite his skepticism, Shawn’s dad gives Shawn his blessing and tells him to go for it.
Shawn and Kaitlyn go back to her room after meeting with his family. Shawn now feels comfortable telling Kaitlyn that he loves her. Kaitlyn seems super happy about it but not as happy as when Nick said it. See pics on previous page for proof.
Shawn: “I’m disappointed that Kaitlyn didn’t tell me she loved me.” Oh. My. God. Seriously, Shawn. Have you seen this show before? The lead doesn’t proclaim their love until the last episode and I know you hate it but Nick IS still in the picture.
After Shawn leaves, Kaitlyn dissolves into tears because she suddenly realizes she’s in love with two people and she can only be with one of them. It’s too bad they don’t have the “phone a friend” option on this show like they do on “Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?” I’m sure Amy Schumer could give her some sage advice right about now.
I can only pray that Kaitlyn chooses Nick or chooses to be alone. Shawn is a disaster.
Next week is “The Men Tell All.” Sounds like Jared is having trouble moving on from Kaitlyn.
In two weeks is the finale. I’ve got my fingers crossed for Nick and Kaitlyn.
Here are some other links I think you’ll enjoy:
OfficeStace.com (She does a nice, spoiler-free recap)
Reality Steve (MASSIVE SPOILER ALERT!! Do not click this link if you don’t want to know how the season ends. I don’t read spoilers until the season is over but Reality Steve is the bomb.)
See you next week!
This week was chock full of great jokes/one-liners. Might be the funniest entry yet!
Thanks, Anthony! 🙂